Where are all the guys?

Hang in there, friends—we’re almost to the end of the year. If you need a little pick-me-up to help you get through holiday parties, family gatherings, EOY reporting, or whatever other December delights are stressing you out, just remember this mantra.

Now say it with me:

Before making the final push to close out Q4, I decided to treat myself to a brief holiday, which included playing dolls with my niece over Thanksgiving and then traveling back to Cape Town to chase the sun. Between catching some Zzzzs on that 13+ hour-long flight, I also took advantage of the prolonged solo time to contemplate the existential. The primary question on my mind:

Where the heck are all the guys?

I’ll explain more below.

Hey, this is Kelsey, and you’re reading the SiteSee newsletter. Think of me as your Big Sis when it comes to travel, inspiring you to keep going places. You can expect an email from me every Friday filled with tips for living a location-independent lifestyle and the gear to get you there.

Travel Story✍️

If you haven’t been a part of the SiteSee-er club for long (First of all, welcome!), then let me get you up to speed on my origin story. *cue opening music*

I first started solo traveling in 2018 and committed to building my life as a full-time digital nomad soon after. But it wasn’t until 2020 that I started traveling with nomad groups. (Spoiler: This new venture was, of course, soon cut short by the pandemic.)

Before all the chaos ensued, I had signed up for my first six-month remote work trip. I was stoked to have the opportunity to travel the world with a group of fellow nomads and was already feeling nostalgic about all the great memories we would make together.

For our first month of travel, our home base was in Medellin, Colombia. To help get us all acquainted with each other, our guide organized a casual happy hour the night before our program officially started. 

As I walked to the bar, I was already writing the script for the romantic comedy of my new digital nomad life.

Tonight, I’ll meet my dream guy—preferably one with a cute accent. Then, we’ll fall in love movie-montage-style on a tour around the world. And then we’ll become an instant freelancing-digital-nomad-ing-international power couple.

I was ready.

Except then I turned the corner and … 

Women. Women, women, women. TONS of women. Like a big, pink Barbie premiere before that was even a thing. Of course, I had no problem with meeting a room full of traveling soul sisters—but I just thought there would be more guys. 

Eventually, I did end up meeting the 5 men in our group, and I loved and adored them all. But it was clear that none of them were going to be the Ross to my Rachel. 

What’s more, I noticed this trend continuing over the years: Every time I traveled in a group, the women always far outnumbered the men. 

My week-long ayahuasca trip in Costa Rica? 15 women and 3 men. My month-long remote work trip to Portugal? Overwhelmingly female. And my month-long group trip to Cape Town? 20+ women and only 2 men.

At that point, I thought the universe was playing a sad joke on me. TBH, I really wanted to be in a relationship—and it seemed like no matter where I went, there were no men at the party I could even dream about playing the leading guy in my rom-com fantasy life.

And turns out, the joke wasn’t just on me. Even after I entered a relationship, I STILL saw the same pattern as I continued traveling in groups. For example, on my recent weeklong trip to Egypt, there were a whopping 2 men compared to the 8 women. And my liveaboard diving trip? 4 ladies. 1 dude.

Now, I read my horoscope daily, so I’m all too familiar with confirmation bias. So to get out of my own head, I decided to chat with some travel friends about their experiences … And we were all on the same page. 

They, too, noticed that travel groups tend to largely comprise women. 

And the numbers backed up our experiences. When I turned to SiteSee Travel Writer Katie Bauer for more research, she discovered: 

• 64% of travelers around the world are women

• Solo travel, freedom, and independence are among the top reasons women hit the roads and skies alone

• Women make up 84% of solo travelers

Together, we came up with some interesting theories as to why women are traveling more than men. For example, maybe it’s a safety thing? Or maybe men tend to be more individualistic and just don’t want to travel in groups? The jury’s still out, but you can get a closer look at why Katie thinks women seem to be dominating travel groups in her piece, Travel is “girl.” We’re (re)claiming it, and rightly so.

Don’t get me wrong—I love traveling with my girls. But we girls love our male counterparts, too, and we want to see more of them traveling with us on the road. 

After all, we believe there’s enough space for everyone to live that digital nomad life. ✨✨✨

Gear Check🧳

If the Kelsey 10 years ago heard I was about to recommend Crocs, she would’ve seriously wondered where it all went wrong. But that’s what I’m about to do. And before you scroll frantically to hit that “unsubscribe” button, check these babies out. 

I kid you not—over a dozen people have given me compliments when I wear these sandals, and every time I reveal they're Crocs, people are genuinely surprised. The best part? Since they’re Crocs, they're incredibly comfortable, easy to stroll in, and require no painful break-in period.

Airport Reads🗞️

• I’m signed up for Miss Excel’s free 1-hour session where she teaches you new Excel functions to save you from hours of unnecessary clicking. If you haven’t seen her before, she’s an absolute gem.

• I packed 5 books for my 90 days in South Africa. And after hearing numerous recommendations, this one has been pushed to the top of my reading list: Traction: How Any Startup Can Achieve Explosive Customer Growth

• I watched Patagonia Films for several hours during my flight to Cape Town. I was thoroughly impressed and inspired—this one was my favorite.

Last Thing✨

Thanks for being here! Before we part ways, I’d like to share three thoughts that came to me while I was playing with my 6-year-old niece during Thanksgiving:

1. Snacks and naps are important—no, vital. Shamelessly prioritize them during your day.

2. Life is supposed to be fun. Do things that make you laugh.

3. You can get anything you want in life. You just need to know who (i.e., which parent) to ask.

Onwards,

Kelsey

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